Adventures of a Sensible Lad Who is Magic

So there I was (I love starting any story with that phrase) in this ultra modern space craft. To call it a ship would be an insult to this advanced technology and we were flying and crashed into these woods, which didn't jolt us at all for some reason. I get off with some random friends and we go searching for this school we were flying to. So when we find it, the ground was made of yellow brick and there was a big circular patch of the original yellow brick road that "only the true of intent" could pass over. So I'm thinking wtf does true of intent mean... that could be anything good or evil. Oh well. Anyways, so we walk across it and try to go inside. So there's this old actor there who I think was the lion maybe telling us that if I didn't drop to my knees and have my friend give me a blessing-- we weren't students. I obviously refused and told him to check my student number and he wouldn't so I BLASTED him with a huge ball of magical goodness and flew past. I even got past some random screen door, but when I saw the two old women selling tickets in front of the gym, I knew we were busted. So, we ended up being sent to the principal’s office (which turned out to be Dorothy herself) and got scolded, but I could stay. After being treated like that, however, I had second thoughts. So I went out to some river to go swimming with some girls who I thought were my friends, but they started laughing insanely and tried to strangle me with a scarf. At this point, I realized that they weren't my friends at all. So we floated downstream for a while (I- being strangled and they-laughing) they stopped and swam to the side as I fell down a small waterfall. Lucky for me I hid in a small eroded underwater cave under the fall. Lucky for me, I could now breathe underwater! So they’re trying to reach down and grab me out when I remembered from the vast amount of useless knowledge I know that ants can live up to 14 hours underwater. So, I did what any knowledgeable magical person would-- I turned myself into an ant. This way, I could float downstream safely and not be detected by the psycho sisters. And so I did. Until I thought it was safe. I met this ogre-pig guy who I thought might possibly be trustworthy, but I took precautions. He invited me into his hut/cabin thing and I said ok, but what he didn't know was that I noticed the ring of soot he had laid around his house. I didn't really know what it was for, but I had a bad feeling about it so I drug my right heel across it as I went inside. My intuitions were right and he tried to eat me or capture me or something negative that I would object to. Lucky for me I could blast the crap right out of him with big wispy balls of light. So, when he was unconscious, I laid a bigger circle around his house so he could never leave. He ended up getting so hungry, he ate his house and then withered away as most evil ogre-pig things should. The End.